Feeling "stuck" is often the result of focusing on the obstacles (or apparent lack of progress) regarding fulfilling our wants, needs, wishes or desires. This may include imagining the outcome the way one hopes it will be, but tainted by a negative expectancy and lack of confidence that things will turn out this way.
A negative outlook may become reinforced by several days, weeks, months or even years of "evidence" of previous efforts resulting in failure (or a lack of success). It may eventually seem easier to give-up on what is important, rather than risk more disappointment. You could say one loses faith in their ability; or even worse, develop faith in their inability to succeed.
So what is the solution? How does one break free and experience the joy, fulfillment and satisfaction that seems so distant?
Through a combination my own personal experiences, conversations with others, and journaling on this topic, here are some ideas that may help. My goal is to assist you with increasing faith in yourself in a positive way... Right now is the perfect time for you to be reminded how magnificent you are, and your incredible capacity to create your life experiences!
- Your current situation is simply a starting point. Be grateful you are not starting from a more difficult position.
- Write down what you want, in a clear, positive way. If you are unsure, then allow yourself to think of something you don't want and then ask yourself this clarifying question: "So, what do I want?" Write your response to this by hand.
- Ask yourself, "Why do I want this?" Write down as many reasons as you can think of -- Why you want what you want.
- "How else can I fulfill on what is important to me?" There may be a variety of ways to fulfill your "why" (your motivation).
- "Why don't I already have what I want?" List all the thoughts, reasons, clues, best guesses, etc, that occur to you.
- "How will having this also benefit others?" Write down all the benefits to family, friends, etc, that you can think of.
- "What am I willing to give (or give up), in exchange for having what I want?" Sometimes we need to let go, to let in.
- Look at yourself in the mirror, smile kindly and encourage yourself by speaking out loud words such as: "You are a good person and deserve a wonderful life." "I love you." "I forgive you." "Thank you." "It's your time to shine!" If you feel any resistance to this, then it's time to let go of the past (after all, you did your best knowing what you knew at the time). Be your own best friend by forgiving yourself, and everyone else... so that you can move forwards in your life.
- "What actions will assist me with having what I want?" Write down every action step you can think of... Then choose one action to take as soon as possible. Have faith that what you want (or something even better!) is now on its way to you!
- If you cannot take the action immediately, schedule a day and time to act. Set an alarm to remind you... Do it now!! :-)
It is important to complete other areas of your life (not just the area involving your desire). If you have an apology to make, make it. If you have any unkept promises, communicate with whoever is affected and recommit in some way that works for you. If you have a mess to deal with, choose one small area and start cleaning it up! This will unlock your energy flow.
Finally, know there is a part of yourself that loves you unconditionally and wants the best for you. Regardless of your past situation or results, or what you are dealing with right now, it is always there for you. If you are open to it, it will lovingly guide you in ways that serve your highest good -- but it will not make decisions for you. I call it your Higher-Self.
The following Guided Meditation will assist you with connecting with this most beautiful, wise and loving part of who you are: